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Jay-Z Is Retiring The Word "Bitch"

The “degradation has passed,” he says. In a poem he wrote for his new daughter Blue Ivy, Jay-Z writes that he won't continue to use the word “bitch” in reference to women anymore. We'll see how that...

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Inappropriate Woo'ing Makes Everything Funnier

Forget “Flirtin' With Disaster.” I want this to be my life soundtrack. Via: ohhaveyouseenthis.com

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Stephen Merchant's Most Embarrassing Moment In College

Recreated last night on Conan with the help of Kate Beckinsale.

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Wendy Williams' Campaign To Save The Twinkie

How's talk show host Wendy Williams doiiiinn' today? Not so well, now that the existence of her beloved Twinkies is being threatened! Wendy is so adamant about keeping the sweet treats on shelves that...

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5-Year-Old Stabs 3 People Over A Juicebox

Kids these days. Deputies responded a reported stabbing at 3:25 p.m., at a mobile home park on Shady Grove Road in Ruckersville, Virignia.WCAV reported that neighbors said the stabbing arose from an...

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Live-Action Rugrats Movie Trailer

Funny or Die has put together this amazing trailer for the most disturbing version of the Rugrats you'll ever see. And in case you needed more reason to click, Maeby and Egg Ann from Arrested...

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Live Mice Found In McDonalds' Burger Buns

This is really gross. I'm totally going to stop eating McDonalds as soon as I get rid of my last three Big Mac coupons. Totally. Via: consumerist.com

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Death Metal Logos For Pop Bands

Designer Mark Hall-Patch did pop band logos in the style of ear-shredding death metal. I cannot wait to hear the new Coldplay single, “God Put a Smile upon Your Hammer Smashed Face.” Via:...

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One Of The Founders Of Pinkberry Chased Down A Homeless Man And Beat Him With...

What an asshole. The incident took place in June 2011 on an off-ramp of the Hollywood Freeway at Vermont Avenue, according to the Los Angeles Police Department. Young Lee, who happens to be one of the...

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Louisiana District Wants To Ban Wearing Pajama Pants In Public

Michael Williams, of Caddo Parish, Louisiana, is trying to ban pajama pants in public after an incident in a Wal-Mart where “group of young men clad in pajama pants revealed his private parts.” A few...

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"I Didn't Know I Was Gilbert Gottfried"

If you thought “I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant” was bad, this will be very disturbing. Well done by Paul Briganti and the crew over at Jest . Via: jest.com

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17 Angelfire Pages That Are Still Up Right Now

Here are 17 sites that are still being hosted by Angelfire and indexed on Google. If you visit them, just make sure to sign their guestbooks. Here's a dial-up sound, to get in the mood before you look...

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"Wayne's World" Babies

Party on, adorably-dressed infants. Via: carlovely

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32 Pictures That Will Make You Say Awwwwwwww

Your heart will explode when you see these pictures. A tiny piglet walking into your hand Another tiny piglet in some grass. A momma pitbull carrying her babies "I'm ready for my walk" View Entire...

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"Extremely Loud And Incredibly Close" For 9/11 Conspiracy Theorists

This video reimagines Tom Hanks not as a lovable, juice box cuddling man, but as a very yelly 9/11 conspiracy theorist. Very yelly. Via: filmdrunk.uproxx.com

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20 Celebrities Who Have Definitely Found The Fountain Of Youth

How else could these people look so young? I WANT ANSWERS AND I WANT THEM NOW! A typical 47 year old versus 47 year old Keanu Reeves. A typical 71 year old versus 71 year old Chuck Norris. A typical...

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Puppy Meets Cows

This feels like it is a massively important moment in interspecies diplomacy.

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Snake Scales Brick Wall

I am awed by this snake’s ability to defy gravity. Because really, how else can you explain how a limbless creature is able to climb a vertical face? I guess if you don’t like snakes, you’ll probably...

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Strange Sounds In Conklin, Alberta

Not sure what the hell that is, but I wouldn’t stick around if I was those guys. mpviral Via: mpviral.com

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Connected

Wow, I can’t think straight after watching this video. This truly blew my mind. I need to take a nap now. mpviral Via: mpviral.com

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